The Rotten Egg

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”

— Mother Teresa

Children at a very early age are able to pick out the children who are “different.”  My son was about 4 when I went to a “sewing” with a bunch of ladies from our church.  The little children were playing together.  As I watched them interact I noticed that it looked like he was playing with them but he wasn’t.  He was in his own little world, doing his own thing within the group.  He wasn’t connected.

When we were riding home in the car that afternoon he said very seriously, “Mommy, am I a rotten egg?” I said, “No honey, why?”  He said, “the other children said I was the rotten egg!”  That hurt me much more than it hurt him.  I realized they had singled him out as different.  That singling has followed him through his life.   Even today at 40, when he is in a group, he is in his own world doing his own thing.

The Aspie isn’t the “rotten egg” but a very special, unique individual.”  It’s up to us as parents to point that out to them, and love them even more for who they are.  God didn’t call us to judge, but to love!

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0 thoughts on “The Rotten Egg

  • May 15, 2010 at 7:02 am
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    O no its so sad, best way to avoid these useless people. Everyone have its own specialty, Aspie too. Don’t worry and be  happy. 🙂

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  • May 21, 2009 at 8:10 am
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    I think this holds true for all children, not just ones with aspergers. 

    I’ve been different my entire life. It often is called to my attention that I ask questions and think on my own, instead of just staying with the general complacency. I was singled out as a child, but not because I had anything like that.I’m sure many people have been on both sides of the spectrum.

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  • May 21, 2009 at 6:15 am
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    i don’t know what to say..but your kid is lucky to have you

    #1 MOM !!!

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  • May 20, 2009 at 7:50 am
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    This article, as short as it is, says it ALL.  I was the rotten egg through my entire childhood.  Unlike you, however, my mom never forgave me for not being normal.  I can’t tell you how much I appreciate reading stuff like this from parents, that the love for the child is more important than what’s ‘wrong’ with them.

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  • May 19, 2009 at 3:41 pm
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    Wow,rotten egg eh? He’s his own person, what’s wrong with that? Just because he’s a little different from everyone else doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with him, in some cases there are though, for example I heard this story about a teacher who treated her student really bad because he smelled, and was a “rotten egg”. turns out he wasn’t always like that and his mother had died and his father didn’t know how to take care of him. Ah, we live in such a judgmental society, but luckily the whole “think outside the box” way of living is being widely accepted amongst my peers.

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  • May 19, 2009 at 3:34 pm
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    My heart goes out to your son. He’s not a rotten egg at all, it’s us for being so judgmental. Give him a hug for me and let him know he is truly wonderful!

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  • May 18, 2009 at 12:54 pm
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    Thanks for your comment,

    Probably because I’m in a busy, social person it’s hard to understand anyone wanting to always be alone. But you’re probaly right. For the person who has a difficult time interacting socially it’s probably much more comfortable being alone. Yes, my son does seem to have a lot of insite into others feelings even though he doesn’t often express it.

    Now almost 35 years after the “rotton egg” story took place my son’s living in a tiny place with his 2nd wife who has similiar social issues and while they don’t have much social interaction with others beyond their special olympics bowling team, they seem very happy.

    Before he married again, he spent almost 15 years contentedly alone.

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  • May 18, 2009 at 11:50 am
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    well, it’s not always bad to be in a solitary world.  It’s quite comfortable.  Everything’s on terms with everything else, no silly nonsense or wasted social effort.  There are far more things to think about than tag and Jan and Pam’s kissing scandal, yet the unique is trapped with the average and cursed. 

    Your son probably has deep understandings that cannot be expressed in words. I think it’s horrible that people of other natures are forced to deal with the daily and shamed in a futile battle of worth. 

    Reply

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