The “On Purpose Mom”
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My 8 year-old autistic son recently gifted me the title of “The On-Purpose Mom.”
And while in moments of frustration, I assume he means this as a derogatory term, I consider it a term of endearment.
Because yes, son, it’s on purpose when I expect you to get dressed independently in the mornings.
It’s on purpose at the end of the day when I expect you to carry in your backpack and unpack your belongings.
It’s on purpose during mealtimes when I expect you to feed yourself.
It’s on purpose when I expect you to use kind words to your family and friends and correct you when you don’t.
It’s on purpose when you struggle to complete homework and I give you the space to express your frustration, but we still power through.
It’s on purpose that instead of bringing your preferred foods to restaurants we’re now expecting you to order from the menu.
It’s on purpose that we’re supporting you to be as independent as you possibly can.
But this doesn’t mean we aren’t here to support you in all the ways in which you still need us. It just means that we’re no longer holding you back from the growth you are ready for.
So when you call me the “On Purpose Mom” please know this fills me with joy. Because every decision I make on your behalf is 100% on purpose!
Love,
Your “On Purpose Mom”
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Article by
Amy Nielsen
My name is Amy Nielsen and I am the owner and creator of the https://bigabilities.com/ blog and podcast as well as Parent Advocate and Early Intervention Specialist for Collaborative Corner for Exceptional Children. Most importantly I am the mother of four amazing children, the youngest is on the Autism Spectrum and has ADHD.
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