Serendipity

It is good to be reminded of the good parts of Asperger’s. When dealing with school and other activities where there is so much expected that just doesn’t come naturally for someone with Asperger’s, it is easy to forget to celebrate the good stuff. The stuff you love, the stuff that reminds you just how special it is that you have this person in your life.

I am talking about Wolfie who will talk to anyone, anytime, anyplace. It doesn’t matter how old you are or how you might look, he will treat you like he treats everyone. With excitement. He has the ability to cut right to the good inside people. I see it happen all the time and it is something that I enjoy so much about him.

I hosted a jewelry party last night at our house for some friends and he really wanted to be part of the party. So, I told him that he could answer the door and show the ladies where the drinks, snacks, and jewelry was. He called that being the butler and ran upstairs to shower and change. He emerged from upstairs about 30 minutes later dressed in what he calls his “khaki suit”. This consists of a pair of khaki pants, his striped button-down shirt, a blue tie, and this old brown corduroy blazer that I got from a thrift store that I never got around to putting buttons on or ironing. He insists that it looks just fine and wears it whenever he can. One of these days I am going to surprise him with some buttons.

He greeted all the guests and was such a little gentleman about it. One of my friends thought he was telling her he was wearing his “tacky suit”, and we all had a good belly laugh about it, although the joke was sort of lost on him. Another friend was feeling down about something going on in her life and was uplifted by his good-natured spirit and enthusiasm. She sent me a message saying how much she enjoyed him and how he really turned her day around.

This morning I was tired and he was being sort of floppy and uncooperative. He was frustrated by everything I was asking him to do, which is all basic stuff like brushing your teeth and put on your shoes. I forgot in the moment to honor who he is and remember the good stuff. I yelled at him which made him frustrated so he cut the laces off his shoes because he needed help untie-ing them and I was too busy loading the car with backpacks and trying to keep Hammy from joining in on the frustration to help.

Looking back, if I would have just stopped and helped him, the morning would have gone much more smoothly. Coming home and seeing my friends’ note helped me to see all the things I was missing from my own child this morning. I am so thankful for these reminders. They present themselves in the most unique way and somehow, at just the right time.

happyaspies

I don’t have asperger’s syndrome, but I am married to a man who does and we have two wonderful little boys. Our oldest son, Wolfie, is seven and has asperger’s syndrome.