Would You Want to Know (Followup)
Followup to a prior post
I’m not normal. I know that. My intellectual abilities. My schooling history. My religious journey. What happened less than four minutes after I was born. My family.
But there were a few things (see prior post) in my past (needing speech therapy, occupational therapy, above-average brains, etc.) that make me wonder if I’m somewhere in the spectrum. I want to say, “no, no, no.” But…I know I’m different. When I originally posted (late May), I wasn’t fully convinced that I was somewhere on the spectrum.
I’m still not. But, a few things…maybe I’m going crazy.
Maybe I’m just an autism-spectrum-hypochondriac.
Maybe I’m trying to figure out why the gears in my head spin the other way?
(When the only tool is a hammer, every problem is a nail. When the only all-encompassing theory is ‘autism spectrum’, every quirk gets held up to that light.)
I mean, I’m looking over (what in my mind is) the stupidest little things.
I get a to-do list. For heavens’ sake, write it down, I can’t remember all that…
I talk to myself. A lot. (Maybe it’s just the hour-each-way commute.)
I go to the ball game at a minor-league park. And I really really want one of those foul balls. And frankly, with the open grassy hill area on the side of the 3rd baseline, I’ve got a shot (not a great shot, but a shot) at grabbing one. Is it just a baseball fan’s obsession or an AS-quirk?
Then, there’s the whole adventure of watching Rain Man. *I’m nothing like that* *am I?*
Finally – To my one friend…you’re so quick to remind me about whats-his-name – that I need to understand him. (You say he’s autistic. Is he? Is it ADD? What’s your proof?). But in the same breath, you ask me “are you a retard?”
(Do you know how mad that makes me?)
If life ever calms down…
…maybe I need to find out.
What is normal to you?
Share this:
Discover more from Autisable
Subscribe to get the latest posts to your email.
I don’t think “normal” exists. From what you’ve posted, I think you are perfect just the way you are.
There’s no normal! Normal’s whatever you want it to be; it’s doing whatever makes you happy. 🙂 Screw everyone else! 😀
If you can think and feel and have relationships with other people and want a life,..which you can accomplish without hurting other people,..then you fit into the “definition” of normal in MY book!!
It’s across the board. I have lupus (on top of the autism), and people constantly say “You don’t look sick”, or question me like I don’t know what I’m talking about. “Think healthy”, they say. “Get more exercise.” Likewise, if I mention Asperger’s, the first thing I get is “You don’t have Asperger’s, you can look me in the eye.”
You’re not crazy. To me having autism IS normal. And I was actually relieved when I finally started seeing a psychologist about having social interaction problems, and he took me seriously and never once questioned me being autistic. Of course, I nearly knocked over a lamp 3 times on my first visit because my nerves were so bad that my hands were sliding back and forth along the wall behind me…
Normal to me is really not normal to many other people.
in my personal opinion (because it’s all I can give, LOL) normal is nothing more than a vague generalization of the overall. I’ve been told several times that I’m not normal. Yet, I’ve never once seen a therapist or psychologist. I’m pretty sure I have some form of OCD, at the very least, but frankly I don’t care. You live each day according to your wants, needs, and hopes. Try to get a little happiness out of it. And, try not to over-analyze the little things, and belittle the little joys you still have. That to me, is normal.