Positivity is Powerful

 A pretty exciting thing happened to me yesterday. I was contacted by a reporter for the “Weekly News” which is part of the D C  Thomson  &  Co (a Glasgow Newspaper and media group)

 lovely guy interviewed me over the phone and had a particular interest in my attitude to Little man’s diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome.  

 It was my positive outlook that got him, he was interested to hear all about how I know embrace my sons condition instead of fighting it! 

 Now, what took me by surprise, was his interest in this side of things. You see, since I first started the I’ve had a number of journalist from the media contact me wanting a story on our most difficult & trying times. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to discuss this, after all it gives those who are currently experiencing them same difficulties, the feeling that they are not alone, and yes they can come out the other side! But to have someone contact me with an interest I’m my positive approach to Aspergers was somewhat refreshing. 

 You see, if this same reporter had read my blog this time a year ago, he wouldn’t have come anywhere near me for a positive story (well, I wouldn’t have that’s for sure)! Ok, I’ve long had the attitude that I will never change little man, but during them long hard days of dealing with a school that didn’t give a donkeys rear end, or while fighting the never ending battling to obtain a statement, positive I was not! 

 I’m proud to say that I’ve come a long way since pre-diagnosis and the day of diagnosis itself.

When I look on my dressing table and see that glass award with the words “Mads Most Inspiring” I can’t help but break out in a smile, and here’s why! 

 My son’s difficulties were the reason I started using a computer, my god back then a snail could type faster than me and yes, I know a snail has no fingers, so what does that say about me ah? Now I’m so fast at typing I could do it with my eyes shut. Back then I was looking for answers and support, why? Because their was nowhere else to find them! That was in 2008 and that’s when I one day found myself blogging… Blogging, the girl who said she would never write through choice, My goodness, I actually love it now! My point being is it was the online community that provided me support and taught me one of the most important lesson of my life to date, one I will always hope to teach another… 

“My child may have Asperger’s but his still the same child, he is no different! The label will not change this” 

 From that moment on I looked at things differently! Once I got that diagnosis, the one I knew he would get (let’s not forget it was two year prior to his formal diagnosis that the child psychologist first told me he was 99% certain my child had Aspergers) I didn’t see it as something we needed to fight through, I was already past the stage of asking myself, “Why my child” or “Was it something I did?” I leant quickly that their would be a lot of battles I would need to fight as a result of the diagnosis. I learnt not to take it personally, it was all about money when obtaining the right support, not the fact nobody believed me, like I first thought. The system didn’t wish to believe any of us for the same reason! The cost to them to give our children that little bit extra support each one desperately required!

 Yes, I wouldn’t change my child, he is who he is and taking his AS away would change so much about him. However of course there are certain things I’d wish away in a second, things that would make his life a little easier, who wouldn’t? I’m his mother after all!

 I don’t blame the parent of the non verbal child or the child who has great developmental delays, when they state they would want to cure autism if they could! How could I, my child can speak and is that bit more high functioning! However I would state that just because he can speak or has the ability to do Math, doesn’t mean his difficulties are not always as trying. So… yes, I’d take away his anxiety, I love him to sleep better, but I wouldn’t take his brilliant mind, his interests and his inquisitiveness as these are parts of his wonderfully personality. 

 It was a really nice interview and I put down the phone feeling positive and positivity is the way forward when your child has a diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome.

 If anything, it’s the only way forward!

Claire Parkinson

A boy with Asperger's

I’m a mother to three gorgeous children, one (my eldest) has a diagnosis of Aspergers