Everyone doesn’t Care
That is the newest concept that we are trying to teach Logan. Have you ever tried teaching abstract social nuances to a child that can’t comprehend the gray areas of life? It is not a walk in the park, believe me. Oh, and you have to try to do it as non verbal or as declarative as possible. So, I can’t tell him what to do. I have to try and set it up so he makes the discovery himself. For my next trick, I will juggles 8 balloons filled with acid while singing the national anthem. lol
You mustn’t think that I am unhappy with the newest work. I am beyond ecstatic that Logan is progressing so well. In a few years, he will completely caught up with his peers and he will be able to fulfill whatever purpose God has for him. I just wish I had some inside information about how his brain works. Just a peek.
This month, we will work on showing Logan how to monitor his conversations to know when it’s appropriate to stop or to respect other people’s feelings. To put it bluntly, Logan needs to learn when he has answered the question appropriately and given enough information. He also needs to learn that sometimes you need to let other people answer even if you know the answer.
Logan has a phenomenal memory. He can look at something one time and remember it forever. This is perfect for Scripture memorization or rote facts. The problem lies in the fact that if he knows the information then he wants to tell it to you. All of the information about that subject that he knows. Can you see where his photographic memory serves him well here?
Unfortunately, not everyone is interested in knowing everything. Some questions are ok being answered yes or no. To top it off, we don’t want him to appear to be a know it all. Other children are not going to want to hang out with him if he makes them feel stupid. We are NOT asking him to pretend to not know the answer or to act stupid. We are trying to get him to notice others in the conversation and determine if he has given enough info or if they are truly interested in hearing more.
- framing (we are going to pick a topic that Logan is really interested in and teach him how to notice when he has given enough info. When he is starting to go overboard, we could sigh loudly or say ” I’m bored” or generally act disinterested. It is considered successful if he picks up on it and stops. Ultimately, we want him to reference us and notice on his own without the exaggerated antics.
- videotaping it and showing it back to him to see if he can pick up on the cues. We then discuss it together.
- Use episodic memory later and help him to see how he can use it in other situations like Sunday School
Another variation would be for Michael and I to talk to him just like he does to others as in never giving them a chance to speak and spouting off a ton of info. We have to pick something he knows a lot about like Halo or Bible . Then we can reflect with him on how he felt when he couldn’t get a word in . It’s sorta like seeing it from another perspective. This should be easy, right?
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@SueZee – that is so funny. I know some of my phrases will come back to haunt me. lol
@keystspf@xanga – That’s a great perspective on it. I really had never thought of that with him. Hmmm, now to brainstorm and see if there is an outlet for him to do that. Thanks for taking the time to point that out.
This reminds me of my hubby saying to our teenager, “Just give me the bottom line.” Now that my son is grown, he is saying the same thing now to Pop. Changing places with age.
If only you could teach ME to do this at 32 years old… LOL The only thing that I’ve caught onto is the fact that it needs to be done. It is tough not to try to share every detail of something I’m fascinated by. Some of the problem is that I often need more information than people give me in order to understand where they are coming from. It doesn’t bother me when someone tells me the “whole story”. I like obscure details so, when someone gives them out, I soak them up. I understand that not everyone appreciates this, but know how the Bible says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”? I am giving you clues to what I need from you in order to process information. Stuff that is trivial and obvious to you, may not be to me. I need to know where it comes from. Some of it is showing off… I like people’s reactions when they learn something new. Some of it, like piping up with the answers in class without raising my hand… was driven by hating the silent expectation of the teacher when no one volunteered the answer. Truthfully, when I was a kid, I didn’t care if other kids thought I was a know it all… but then again, I also didn’t realize that was why I had very few friends. I guess maybe Logan might need a place where that kind of thing is appreciated. He needs an outlet for it…