My Sons Letter of Apology to Bus Driver (when he cut the bus seats)
From: AutismToday.com
When Jonny was in the 6th grade he was told he had to write a letter of apology to the driver before they would let him ride the bus again. This letter certainly opened our eyes to the abuse that many children with autism may never be able to speak of.
May 17, 2001
Dear Pat,
I am sorry for the seat, but I got angry because of Nicholas, because he’s annoying me sometimes (99.9% of the time he is) and he’s on the first bus I get on to go to school. He throws leftover chocolate Jello pudding (in a container with holes on the lid) at me when he’s getting off, and it gets my clothes dirty (mom doesn’t want me to wear dirty clothing). While he’s on, he and his friend gang up on me (and, occasionally, tell other big kids to do it) and they occasionally move from seat to seat to get at me! They move ahead, one pair of seats at a time, bonk me on the head, and rush back to their seat. Fortunately, his buddy had to move to the front seat. And sometimes, still in their seats, they throw assorted junk at me (jello pudding, paper balls, etc.) sometimes they miss. He sometimes says I live in a garbage dump, a cardboard box, and on certain times he calls me “gaylord,” gay not meaning happy. Matt told me to say “gee, thanks, I’ll remember that!” when Nicholas says I am a gaylord. He sometimes swears. The one kid I saw and liked in his family was Nicholas’s kid brother! Since I can only sit in the 4th seat or further up, I’m a supreme target. Fortunately, they have never stolen my lunch yet. The reason I made those holes was because I needed to do something to release my tension. Mrs. Lorenz and I talked about what I could do instead of damaging other people’s stuff.
Sincerely,
Jonny Sicoli
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I remember one day, I said something rude to my school bus driver Stella by accident which made her very upset. And I don’t want to lose my privilege of riding on the school bus. So I wrote her an apologize letter to her with a picture of Ed Sheeran(my favorite singer) attached. And then, she forgave me with a hug.
That’s amazing, what a letter! Sad that your kid had to write it, but what an incredible job.
This letter is kind’of sad for a few other reasons, however.
One, because the bus driver should have noticed and done something. At one of my schools, they picked on this guy who lived in a trailer so bad that they assigned us seats after he flat out refused to get onto the bus and wouldn’t talk about it but someone else tattled. Two, because your kid is kind’of whining about everything and might start using the fact that he’s different to avoid difficult social situations. He will eventually be by himself and have to deal with them.
I had trouble riding the bus as well. Tell him to befriend the biggest asshole. That worked for me initially. It was always the other girls who would scream things like, “LONER, LOSER! LONER, LOSER!” Yes, I know, this is so cliche. None of you want to hang out with me. THere’s nothing I can do, but be quiet. I actually used to steal things from the children who made me angry,especially their texts because they’d have to pay for them or would be unable to do their homework. I have a bit of a temper myself and am a great sneak. Eventually, I scared them because of all the shootings that happened at once, and they just left me alone. Then all I had to deal with were teachers who had failed in life themselves. I made a 100% in the class where the teacher asked if I could read and everyone laughed. I was never that interested in school, but I’ll never forget that social studies class, “I think that girl knows the answer.” My hand was always up. I nearly memorized the book.
aww. D=
I partially blame the system and partially blame the parents. My parents whupped my butt when I was bad. Nowadays that’s child abuse. The system does not distinguish between a spanking and actually beating the HE** out of a child. They recommend time-outs. If you have kids the first thing you learn is that they always find a way to entertain themselves in the corner. And if you add time for not sitting still, the system still calls it childabuse because now you are making them sit there for an ‘inappropriate’ amount of time. They reccomend 1 minute for each year your child is old. yeah. Not effective.
I also blame parents. Not only for buying into the system, but parents even in my own generation, won’t ground their children or spank them. They say over and over that they want their kids to grow up to be their ‘own’ people. I believe that kids can be their own people while still having limits.
Not only that, but I have also been told by parents of other five year olds that it’s ok for their kids to hit mine. Because at 5 years old you are too young to understand right from wrong. I even once had a parent tell me that my kid should just be nicer to her kid and it wouldn’t happen. I was there. My daughter asked to have a turn on the swing, and was then shoved face first into the driveway. How could she have been nicer?
These are only some of the reasons why I am upset about how children are turning out these days.
otherwise, I approve of this letter entirely.
Children can be so cruel; I’ve seen it firsthand.
that is soo sad.
oh my goshh that’s so sad 🙁
kids are so mean!
:[[[
wow ..:(
Wow, kids are really cruel. I hope after this note was written the bus driver took some sort of action against these kids. My brother (who has P.D.D.) was having similiar issues on the bus so my mom found him alternative transportation
I was the kid that stuck up for those kids.
I despise garbage people like that. They usually grow up to be the people in suits with the drop-top on the cell phone cussing at you on the road for doing the speed limit. But I digress..
this makes me sad 🙁
Autsim is so hidden and so many people ignore it unless it is realy in your life.
Heartbreaking
Oh, I know how it feels to be that kid. Instead of taking any of my anger on other people’s things though; I internalized it and aimed it all at myself. I don’t have any for of autism (that I’m aware of), so that sort of abuse doesn’t just happen to autistic kids.
Wow. Poor kid. Being on a public school bus is hard enough, but when other kids are targeting you… wow.
Goes to show how cruel NT children can be. *shrug* Sad…but true!
what horrible little monsters.
I don’t think the bus driver could possibly be mad if she/he understood the situation.
<3
This is bullcrap. =/ It is impossible for a bus driver NOT to see that stuff going on. They have a special mirror that practically lets them see the knees of the kids in the very back row. We have the same kind of mirror in my mom’s van and when I’m in the front seat I can see EVERYTHING going on in the car. Either that bus driver is too chicken to step in and help, or they do not care. This kid should not have been forced to apologize for anything.
I have been amazed at some of the school bus stories I’ve heard from stuff that happens on some of our buses around here. The seats are so high that the bus driver often doesn’t see what’s really going on. We’ve had several kids forced to find other ways to school because of their bullying on the bus… and other bad behaviors like endangering others. (I would never want to drive a bus! But for those brave souls who have a heart to do it… good luck!)
I’d rather have the kid cut a bus seat, if the bullying continues, he might end up cutting himself. Thats how these things start anyway.
My son with Asperger’s was similarly picked on in elementary school & middle school, and on the bus to/from middle school. I spoke with school officials numerous times. The result of that was they would sometimes have a “talk” with the other child/children but not really do anything, or they just wouldn’t do anything, not even talk; and they suggested that I put my son on medication to “calm him down” because they felt he was overreacting to minor annoyances! The situation is much better now that he is in high school. The principal there has a “Zero Tolerance” policy for harassment & bullying, and it works! This policy extends to the bus ride to and from school as well. There have been a couple of minor incidents which were dealt with quickly and appropriately, and he is much more at ease and happy to be going to school than at any other time in his life, and his grades have improved quite a lot too. I think it all depends on the school principal and the policys they have and how they enforce them.
This is sad.
This isn’t limited to autism, though it certainly is concentrated there.
$.02
Kids are unnecessarily cruel. Best he solve his problem with them one way or another before he develops contempt for people in general. I should know, I’ve been picked on a lot and now I grew to dislike pretty much anyone I meet.
How the hell does the bus driver not pay ATTENTION to this crap!?
@DrugInducedDuck@xanga – EXACTLY. Pudding > Gold back when I was young. LOL
-Kunoichi
🙁
That’s really sad.
i’m sorry your son had to endure that treatment from his classmates. im wondering about both the bus driver and those students. after all the attention lately, why isnt there an attendee on the bus? ive heard of some teachers talking to students about having students with special needs in their classroom. why dont other students say something?
That’s terrible. Just terrible.
kids are so cruel.
):
Aw, that`s so sad. ): Evil, evil little kids xP
What has the world come to when kids are so willing to waste pudding…
It’s sad but I’m confused as to why the line is “to the abuse many children with austism…”
Why does it have to be austism? I would say children in general. Teachers and faculty aren’t willing to deal with children and most of the time parents don’t really pay attention to what their own kids are telling them. One time I actually went to the office to complain about kids throwing rocks at me and they never did anything.
Wow. Kids are still assholes. I endured some of that stuff too when I was a kid. Never spoke up, always feared that something worse would happen to me if I did.
terrible stuff. kids just dont understand. good post on opening our eyes on the abuse that goes on for any kid who cant speak up for themselves !
That’s a great letter though; shouldn’t the bus driver or the school administration be doing something to counter this? Shouldn’t those kids doing this to Jonny be writing letters of apology?
Our son with Asperger’s had to deal with bullying from a boy at church when we were new there. We finally had a private chat with the kid back behind the church, and he was informed that if he didn’t change his ways, we’d get him whatever help he needed to change them. I guess it scared him, because that is the last that he ever picked on our son (calling him “gay” and other assorted things . . .)
Kids are so cruel. I wish their parents taught them better.
wtf. kids these days have no ‘mercy’ *lol. i guess there’s no other word*. good thing kids in here don’t do that
this is classic, as a kid growing up i endured a lot of these same things.
it is honestly horrible. these things set kids up for the rest of their lives.some children can handle it, others cant.in todays society, we cant sit back and treat this like a funny little game because things like columbine happen. everyday i feel like these kids become more and more exposed to gangs, cliques, separating, and out casting each other. if we dont take better precautions to stop this from happen i can garuntee we will see an astronomical increase in school fights, brutality, and even shootings.
kids can be so cruel! amazing what you can understand in the eyes of a child huh? and how did the bus driver not notice all those things?!
i probably wouldve blown up and lashed out the bully instead of the seat. i mean what a bastard. i;d seriously beat the crap outta the kid that even attempt to do that to me. back when i was in juior high, i stood up for people that were “different” and picked on. why? mostly because they were different and wouldnt defend themselves. and i got some sort of satisfaction from being the persons friend when no one else would.
I couldn’t be upset with anyone after reading that. I hate school buses. I saw similar things happen when I took one.
That’s absolutely terrible.
Kids can be freakishly cruel sometimes.
yesh, the worst i did was give insulting letters to two kids on the bus back in forth grade (also, in one part of this letter, did this kid get molested?)
Aww, no bus driver can be mad after reading that.
That’s so sad.